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idiocy noted and appreciated

April 12, 2012

It’s been a year.  I started by writing about crazy carpool people, so it only seems fitting that two people screamed at each other in the line, just as I was dropping The Boy and The Girl at school this morning.

There’s a pretty efficient system in place to keep the cars moving during the morning rush.  About 5 cars at one time are able to let kids out, and you’re supposed to wait until you’re at the front of the line.  There are older kids assigned as carpool monitors.  They help the little ones get out of the car and safely in to school.  So it goes like this:  stop, have your door opened for you, let kids out, and pull away.  Simple, right?

Not always.  Sometimes people don’t understand that they need to pull all the way up to where the sidewalk begins.  I completely get that driver substitutions are necessary, so not everyone in line is a seasoned veteran, but GEEZ.  Doesn’t the violent waving and gesturing towards the front give you any clue to MOVE UP?

As you can see, I realize that being in the line can be a little frustrating at times.  The guy this morning took it to a whole new level.

We were in the line, and per usual The Kids were gathering up their things and unbuckling their seatbelts, so they’d be ready when it was our turn.  I noticed that the cars weren’t moving, but we were running ahead of schedule today, so it didn’t stress me out.  But when we were still sitting there a couple of minutes later, I started paying attention.

Up at the very front of the line sat a car with a 5th grade student holding the door open.  I pretty much just figured that Grandma was dropping off today, and didn’t quite understand the process.  No big deal.

Not everyone felt that way, though.  The car behind her started honking their horn.  They honked again.  First Car Driver rolled the window down to kindly explain the hold-up, and Second Car Driver rolled his down, too.  He wasn’t kind.  He was yelling.  I couldn’t hear him, but I have quite an imagination.  I couldn’t hear her either, but she was yelling back, and as far as I could tell, she wasn’t pleased.  The teacher standing nearby was motioning for SCD to just go around, but I think he was enjoying ripping this lady a new one.  You’d assume that he was in some major hurry, considering how urgently he mashed the horn button, but he had the time to stick around and yell about it.

Now FCD was mad, too.  As he whipped around her, leaving the parking lot, she stopped and craned her neck yelling as he went by.  It was a regular Jerry Springer carpool.

Sadly, the drama ended there.  The line began moving again.  We pulled up (to the very front of the line, where the sidewalk begins), our door was opened, and my kids got out.  I did forget to say goodbye to them, because I was too busy asking the carpool monitor what the heck happened.

Come to find out, FCD’s young son’s shoe had fallen off, and she was helping him get it back on.  If it’d been me, I’d tie and retie that shoe as soon as the beeping began, not even worrying that the rest of carpool would have to suffer for it.

Oh, carpool, how I have missed thee.

Thanks for checking out my silly words each week.   While I appreciate every reader, I’m eternally grateful to all the idiots out there who continue to do stupid things so I can write about them.  If I could, I’d buy each and every one of you a beer.  Thanks a million, keep up the good work, and cheers!

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