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Grocery shopping can be fun

May 18, 2011

I enjoy going to the grocery store.  I make a list, I plan the week’s meals and I rarely buy anything not on the list.  I like finding a deal and being organized.

That being said, I’m not an Extreme Couponer.  I’m not even a Couponer.  The shows about these people who buy eleventy-million packs of sliced ham for a grand total of $.60 baffle me.  Who needs that much stuff?  I saw a lady checking out last week with 37 bags of croutons.  For real.  How on God’s green earth will they not go stale prior to consumption?  When that happens I suppose she can grind them up to make breadcrumbs.  Besides actually making my own croutons, it’s the only thing I know to do with stale bread.  Does anyone else see the added step here?

Once, when I had mustard on the list, a Couponer was buying every single container of brand-name mustard (because she needed them all?) which left me mustardless and she offered me one yellow bottle, a coupon for that and another for free honey mustard.  The deal she was after gave me two free bottles of mustard.  I’ll admit that was fun.

However, the real joy of grocery shopping comes with what you see when you’re not just looking at your list.  There was the lady who had her small dog (in the store) with its painted fingernails and whatnot and she was consulting her canine about which flavors of soup to purchase.  Also worth mentioning is the woman who donned head to toe brown spandex, which looked so skin-like that The Girl even said (out loud) “Mama, is she naked?”

During Masters week, my regular haunts on were slap in the middle of traffic, so I had to divert to a Wrightsboro Road grocery store.  It’s the store we always used when we lived in our first home, but I hadn’t been in some time.  I was in a slight hurry, with only three things on my list:  milk, wine and bread.  If you’d ever been to this specific store, you’d know that these items are nowhere near one another.  Sweet.

On my way from one end of the store to the other I got distracted on the cereal aisle, where an apparent husband was asking his wife if he could get oatmeal.  She assured him that “this damn cereal” was not on the list.  Because I was in a hurry, I kept walking, despite the strong urge to satisfy my curiosity.

Fortunately for me, this guy’s mom was on another aisle but moving quickly thanks to her moto-scooter, so I found them among the bread.  He told on his wife (who was still near the cereal, not quite as mobile as her mother in law) and man, the MIL was ticked.  She scooted so fast I wasn’t sure I could keep up.  But I did.  Discretely, of course.  The fight that ensued was unreal.  Scooter Lady ducking, on wheels, back and forth, the hurling packages of hot dogs by her dear daughter-in-law.   The only thing the DIL had to duck was the strong words of her now angry MIL.  About five minutes later, the store manager came to settle things down.  Everyone somehow left satisfied.  I’m pretty sure I saw oatmeal in the cart.

See, grocery shopping can be fun.  For budget’s sake, stick to your list, but always watch for flying hot dogs.

One Comment leave one →
  1. Jason permalink
    May 18, 2011 7:43 pm

    Thanks for making grocery hunting fun again! I’m gleeful with anticipation of my next Kroger stop 🙂

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